Lazy steak and ale pie but it’s in the style of an instagram beauty influencer

Editor's note: This will not age well and is probably a terrible idea but there you go. Enjoy. #AD  You guys. You huns. You BOSSBABES. It’s time for like, the big reveal!! For the last few months, i’ve been working super hard on my range of slow cooked bovine protein products and OMG they are … Continue reading Lazy steak and ale pie but it’s in the style of an instagram beauty influencer

In defence of ugly food: hot concrete mushroom soup

I made a new Instagram account this week, for reasons relating to the longevity of a future career in food media. The whole process irritated my cynicism gland enough to produce a few squirts of suspicion before I relaxed into it and made my photos public. The thing is, I’ve never really liked Instagram. The … Continue reading In defence of ugly food: hot concrete mushroom soup

I have aged 50 years in 4 months (a recipe)

Hello chaps, apologies for my absence these last few weeks. The time has just disappeared in a puff of 40-hour working week. Such fun. Anyhoo, I haven’t slowed down in the kitchen at all during this last month, despite the barren wastelands of the old blogeroo. No; far from it. I’ve played with celeriac for … Continue reading I have aged 50 years in 4 months (a recipe)

7 Kitchen F*ck-Ups (and how I mostly fixed them)

It occured to me, as hot butternut squash soup spaffed itself merrily across my work clothes the other evening, that no one really writes about their own kitchen mishaps. Yeah, sure, there's troubleshooting guides aplenty by lots of foodies, dressed up in warm, genial tones: "Hush, hush darling, don't worry about your split ganache; just … Continue reading 7 Kitchen F*ck-Ups (and how I mostly fixed them)

PRETTY SIMPLE PESTO PARMIGIANA

To set the scene for this dish, please type "noot noot, toot toot" into Google Translate and get the little man in the laptop to tell you how it sounds in Italian. Preferably over some loud speakers. I promise you won't regret it. Right, that should absolutely lay out the mood: we're flirting with italian … Continue reading PRETTY SIMPLE PESTO PARMIGIANA

Balsamic Mushrooms with Halloumi and Basil

I have, over the last few months, graduated from studentdom and become a proper adult. I now pay council tax, have too much laundry and made my ever first visit to Halfords to buy a special treat for my pet car. Such good work, Freeborn! Do reward yourself with an after-work nap and quick browse … Continue reading Balsamic Mushrooms with Halloumi and Basil

2 Ingredient Blender Hot Chocolate

I was asked recently whether I knew any good cooking 'hacks'. "Err..well...um...use enough salt?" I proffered hopelessly, the cooking bit of my brain escaping out of my ears and slithering away from me, winking. I scrambled desperately for something else. "And, um, let me see...don't bother peeling carrots." Cooking Brain laughed and mooned me, before … Continue reading 2 Ingredient Blender Hot Chocolate